Sunday, March 25, 2007

A Shock

After a few months of silence, I got an email last night from my step-grandmother via my grandpa's account saying that he was in the hospital and having hallucinations and that he wasn't going to be coming home. It said that he was also denied access to a nursing home because they didn't have a mental ward. WEIRD! My grandpa has never been most of us, he's had depression from time to time, but this was news that came out of left field. So, I anxiously get on the phone with everyone that I can in my family and try to find out what is going on. It seems that my step-grandma has given up and no longer feels that she can care for him. I honestly don't know if my grandpa can survive being in a home. He has always hated them and I worry about his spirits when he is put in there. I found out today that its official...he will be transferred into a home on Friday. I feel so sad and so helpless being so far away. i know calls and that kind of stuff are important, but I wish he wasn't such a long and expensive plane ride away. I am sure that I will see him again...but it looks like the person I will see next wont be the same that I saw 2 years ago. The memories that I have I am holding onto so strongly...the hugs, the words he spoke...those things I cherish.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

March Madness

No...not the basketball tourny...but my schedule. I have not stopped these past few weeks. Lots of changes. I'm getting settled into my 2nd job...its not so bad most of the time, but it does have its annoying moments. Although the cash it brings at the beginning of the week is happiness. I also volunteered for a big girl scout event last weekend. I got to do greeting and led games of twister. It was a blast hanging out with all the kids!
Big change this month...I have moved. The roommate thing was not a good idea for me, so I decided to rent an older townhouse that was much cheaper. This place is really cute and its nice to have my own place again. I love having my office back and my next project will be decorating the office. I'm thinking bright colors and lots of fun!
All of this whirlwind of activity and change has made me a tired tired girl. I have really neglected connecting with people and I know that is something that I need to have in my life daily. I know in this life, we are not meant to go it alone and I have spent a lot of time lately thinking about that truth. I tend to spend much of my day to day life without having personal interaction with others. I want to be deeper with the people in my life. Although I have so many important people far from me physically...I need to make a better effort to be closer to them and open myself up more. I do not need to walk through life with a sense of lonliness...I need to continue to put myself out there with the people that come across my path...whether they are down the street or across the country. People are the most important thing to have in our lives.

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